Countdown to Hannah

This last week has been mostly uneventful, thus, the lack of entry. We have 11 days to the arrival of Baby Hannah and are getting very excited for her to be here. However as it nears I find myself getting more anxious as well. Throughout the pregnancy I tend to asssume everything is and will be fine but as the end draws near many fears start to rise to the surface. What if there is something wrong with Hannah? What if she has an illness or dability? What if something goes wrong during surgery? What if Grace feels unloved or forgotten? I realize these are useless worries, as there is no way to know until it all happens, but in the sleepless hours of the night (which are many) these are thoughts that plague my mind. On a more positive note, we made a countdown chain for Grace when we hit the two week mark. It is like an advent chain only we are counting down to the arrival of baby sister. Gracie does not wuite have a grasp on time yet so I thought this would be a good way to help her understand when it is happening. She does so much better with everything when she knows what to expect. She seems very excited for Hannah and tells us about going to the hospital to see her and then mommy and daddy coming home with baby Hannah. I hope these conversations are a good indication of her grasp on the concept.

In other news, Zach is working on his senior project like a mad man. His goal is to finish it before the bay arrives so that once she is here he can focus on her and the job hunt without the cloud of school hanging over his head. Despite our great desire to stay in Eugene, we are accepting the reality that we will likely have to move. I hope this move can be delayed by a few months so we can adjust to one change at a time, but I suppose only time will tell. Having so much of our future up in the air is a huge challenge for me. I like to feel in control of what is going on and I definitly do not feel that way now. However, if the last 18 months has taught me anything it is that I do not always know what is best. When Hynix shutdown I thought it was the worst thing that had happened to us. Our carefully planned future was suddenly gone and we were being thrown into a world of unknowns. It turned out to be a good thing though when Zach had the opportunity to go back to school full time and complete his degree. Although this has taken its toll on our current situation I have no doubt that in the long run his obtaining an education will get us so much further in the long run than advancing through the ranks at Hynix would have. Anyway, I apologize for the rambling but it is very therapeutic for me to work through all my thoughts. So, that is us this week. As I said not much in the way of news. Just us living our lives and trying to make the most of it.